Tuesday, May 8, 2007



I am a mother whose baby has died.
A part of me is missing, never again to be found.
But I am still his mom, and he is still my child.

Do babies grow up in Heaven?
Yes, he does. Every night in my dreams.
First tooth, first step, splashing in his bath,
and Oh my gosh!!! He is so full of mischief!

I see a fuzzy caterpillar while walking on a trail.
"Lookie here, my son, do you see what I see?"
His tiny finger, cautiously reaching for the touch...
I see the wonder in his eyes,
hear the squeal of his voice, see the smile on his face.
I feel the pride and love in my own heart.

I sit here writing this with a lump in my throat.
Wondering what will you think?
Will you think I am crazy?
I am not! See, to me this is real.
This is not just a dream.
This is my life now. This is what is normal.

I know you can't see what I see,
nor do I ever want you to feel what I feel...
To you my baby is dead.
To you he's not real.
To you, he was just a dream.

Author: Cheryl Haggard

Monday, May 7, 2007


Here is a portrait of my beautiful family.
Chase is 13, Anna just turned 11 on April 30th, Natalie is 7 and our angel Maddux is represented by the "Pooh Bear".
No need to know how old Mike and I are...