I have a precious photograph Classic and timeless in it's style Of time spent with my baby, who lives in Heaven now. It shows a little boy, who is loved so very much Even death can't stop the feeling of longing for his touch.
"You should be over it by now," you might think or say to me... But still I have his photograph
Valued more than all the world's wealth. I wouldn't be who I am without it.
Mom had some homework this weekend...Had to write about my son Chase to his teachers. I wanted to share this with you:
CHASE EMERSON HAGGARD
Chase was born in California October 22, 1993 to Michael and Cheryl Haggard. He was our first born. Chase has two younger sisters, Anna 11 and Natalie 7, and a younger brother, Maddux who was born in 2005 and died at the age of 6 days. Our family moved from Florida to Colorado in 2003. We wanted to make the move before Chase started middle school. He left many close friends in Florida, which he still sees every summer and spring break.
Our son Chase, truly has a beautiful soul. He has a good heart and is respectful to his elders and friends. He is very talented with a computer, loves to read and is an exceptional baseball player. We are encouraging him to learn Spanish, so he may speak it fluently one day and teach his mother.
Chase does enjoy school. Chase is a good student, and makes good grades. We both think that EMS is too easy for him. We don’t think that he applies himself 100%. We basically think he does enough to ‘get by,’ with A’s and B’s. He never seems to come home with any homework, telling us that he finished it all in school. We have never had a teacher complain about him or his work.
We believe Chase’s strong points in school are reading, and writing. He has an incredible and very active imagination. If we had to pick a weakness, maybe Science, but he has never expressed trouble or dislike with any subject. Chase is not shy about asking questions, but might not seek help if he has trouble understanding something, especially if it has already been taught and demonstrated. I think that this part of him would try to figure it out himself, instead of making himself look unfavorable in the eyes of a teacher.
We are very proud to have Chase as our son. He has never done anything to disappoint us or cause us heartache. Through his actions, we are judged as parents. As far as accomplishments, what can we say? He is 13 years old. We hope that one day the world sees us, through him.
She has the right to see the man I am trying to set her up with.
This is more her choice...
See how he loves his neices and nephew?
The Diva, Jacquelyn and the Princess...
(sounds like a book...)
This is Jacquelyn...She cuts, styles, and sometimes colors the Princess and the Diva's hair...
I am trying to recruit her as a sister in law... Really, seriously lets think about this. She LOVES my kids...She is incredibly nice and has a wonderful personality. She seems to love life, and I'm sure she knows how to have fun. I like her...So what more could a brother ask for?
Don't tell me that you understand, don't tell me that you know. Don't tell me that I will survive, how I will surely grow. Don't tell me this is just a test, that I am truly blessed. That I am chosen for the task, apart from all the rest. Don't come to me for answers, that can only come from me. Don't tell me how my grief will pass, that I will soon be free. Don't stand in pious judgment of the bonds I must untie. Don't tell me how to grieve, don't tell me when to cry. My life is filled with selfishness, my pain is all I see. But I need you and your love...Unconditionally. Accept me in my ups and downs, I need someone to share. Just hold my hand and let me cry, and say, "My friend, I care." ~Author Unknown~
And my name is Maddux. I live in heaven now. I was born February 4th, 2005, and I died on February 10th, 2005. My family misses me very much. Ask about me sometime, and see how my mommy's eyes light up.
NILMDTS video of Maddux
Christmas Photo - 2007
In Honor of Maddux:
The mention of my child’s name
may bring tears to my eyes,
but it never fails to bring
music to my ears.
If you really are my friend,
please don’t keep me
from hearing this beautiful music:
It soothes my broken heart
and fills my soul with love.
Finding my new normal:
Like the butterfly, I have the strength and the hope to believe. And in time, I will emerge from my cocoon... Transformed.